Yes, I got to meet The Mistress THREE times in the last week. That’s twice more than any other week before but all things do eventually come to an end (wish it was the same case about my diet). We sat, chatted, had lunch and it was all running smooth. She even invited me to an event she’s hosting next month which is a good sign, I think. I’d say it was a homerun, a touchdown, a 3-pointer buzzer-beater feeling being right next to her. This column entry may be the only one ever where I don’t complain about her not giving me any face (get it?).

Hello all. I’m loving the cool breeze in the weather today (I started writing this last week for people who are surprised about that last statement), really feels like I should skip work, go to this new café owned by one of the divas (you’re welcome Latte). So not only did I get to see the divas four times in the past two weeks, I also made a quick video for this column with the help of Captain. I enjoyed the times when we had interns we could harass with piles of never-ending articles, events, meetings etc. and I’m pretty sure I’m going to have just as much as fun as I did then like I will now. Why you ask? The intern is a he.

He is a bearded, testosterone filled homo-sapien and he’s “taking my place” according to F2. So far, I’ve heard he was late to the interview (I wasn’t..) and so Captain (pissed as a hungry lion) had to postpone. Maybe I should interview him? How interesting would that be? It would be like Donald Sterling being interviewed by Magic Johnson. Epic!

This post has been long overdue and it could be because of Michael Jackson’s new album which I’m totally not advertising right now. My apologies readers (if any of you has stuck around). Wait, I just realized I haven’t mentioned her in the past two paragraphs. Is it a sign? I don’t know but what I did find out literally a minute ago is that the intern has arrived and great news: It’s a she. I am jumping off my seat right now. Welcome intern, I hope you like your nickname (which I haven’t thought of yet).

Someone get me out of here, I’m having heartaches, stomachaches, and it’s too hot outside to go for a walk. I’m going to try and escape, see the intern, the divas, and maybe The Mistress. I really hope she doesn’t read this and finds out she was third on that list. Alright, enough chatting, I’m off.

This is the end of a rather random entry to my column. Stay tuned next week as I will be sharing information about the intern, get to know her a little better, have F2 do her mental scan/analysis and hopefully dig deep enough to find her dark secrets. I’m kidding, welcome..

Adnan Al-Timimi a.k.a Man Outnumbered is in a dilemma. Having a mistress can be risky but visiting her is an absolute delight. Follow his column to know more about his adventures with The Mistress.

Illustration by Aysha Al-Houli

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